Noma yimuphi umzali oye wachaza "izinyoni nezinyosi" kwengane mhlawumbe uyaqonda ukuthi nakuba le ngxoxo ingaba inselele futhi ingakhululekile ngezinye izikhathi, inkulumo mayelana nocansi, uthando, kanye nenqubo yokukhiqiza nendodana ibaluleke kakhulu futhi kuyadingeka. Ngeshwa, ukuxoxa ngokukhululekile ngesinye isimo somuntu ukuthi wonke umuntu uzobhekana nakho, ukufa nokufa, kuvame ukunganakwa.
Lesi sihloko sinikeza izizathu ezinhlanu zokuthi kungani ukusebenzisa i-standby yokudlala ikhadi elikhethekile lokuphela komdlalo kungakusiza ukuthi ubambe le ngxoxo ebalulekile nomuntu omthandayo.
Iyini umdlalo wekhadi lokuphela komdlalo / i-deck?
Namuhla, kunezinhlelo eziningi zekhadi ezikhethekile ezingasiza abantu baqale ingxoxo ngazo zonke izinhlobo zezihloko ezibalulekile, ezifana nemali nemali yomuntu siqu, umshado nobuhlobo, imikhuba namakhono omphakathi, nokuningi. Ngokungafani nemidlalo yamakhadi yendabuko edlalwa ngekhadi elijwayelekile lokudlala amakhadi, lawa madokhumenti akhethekile agxila kancane emncintiswaneni futhi anqobe nokunye ekuxhumaneni komphakathi futhi athola abahlanganyeli ukuba 'bavuleke' komunye nomunye. Ngenkathi ivame ukujabulisa, inhloso yalezi ziningi zokukhuphula ukugqugquzela ingxoxo nenkulumo eqotho.
Lokhu kuyinjongo yokugcina umdlalo wekhadi lokuphelisa impilo: ukukhuthaza nokugqugquzela ingxoxo enenzuzo phakathi kwabahlanganyeli mayelana nemibono yabo, izimo zengqondo nezifiso eziphathelene nezihloko ezinzima zokufa nokufa.
Imidlalo yekhadi enjengalezi ingathinta eziningi zezihloko ezibalulekile, ezijulile zomuntu siqu, njengezokwelapha zokwelapha okuphila; okubaluleke kakhulu njengoba ukufa kusondela; izinto umuntu anethemba lokuthi uzozifeza, aka "uhlu lwazo lwamabhakede"; umngcwabo othize, izikhumbuzo kanye nezikhalazo; ukuthi ulindele ukukhunjulwa kanjani; njll.
Izizathu Zokusebenzisa Amageyimu KaKhadi
Uma ungathanda ukuxoxa ngendaba yokufa kanye / noma nokufa nomuntu omthandayo ukuze ufunde ngezifiso zabo zokugcina kodwa ukuthola kunzima ukuqala le ngxoxo, bese usebenzisa umdlalo wekhadi lokugcina / lokudlala (njengalezo kuboniswe esithombeni ngenhla) kungakusiza uqale le ngxoxo nganoma yikuphi noma kuzo zonke izizathu ezilandelayo:
1. Kuyinto Elula Ukuphakamisa
Ngokuvamile, isisindo esinzima kunazo zonke esibhekene nazo ngokuxoxa ngezifiso zokuphela kokuphila komuntu ngokuvamile sikhona ezingqondweni zethu njengoba silwela ukuthola ukuthi singakwazi kanjani ukuletha isihloko esithi "taboo" sokufa nokufa noma othandekayo . Ngokufana nokuthi bangaki abazali abazokwazi ukuchaza "izinyoni nezinyosi" ezinganeni ekuqaleni kwesaba le nkulumo, kuvamile ukucabanga ukuthi ingxoxo mayelana nokuphela kokuphila komuntu othandekayo / izifiso ezingase zidlale ngaphambi kwesikhathi. Ngokuvamile, sisebenzisa konke ukubhuka okucatshangwayo noma inkinga ebonakalayo njengesinye isizathu sokuvala le ngxoxo ebalulekile futhi akwenzeki neze kwenzeke.
Iqiniso liwukuthi ngeke uthola isikhathi esiphelele, indawo noma amagama ukuze uqale izingxoxo eziphilayo mayelana nokufa noma ukufa nomuntu othandekayo, yingakho i-game / ipaki yekhadi yokugcina yokugcina yokuphila ingasisiza.
Esikhundleni sokuhlukumezeka ukuthi, "Hey, othandekayo, ingabe ufuna ukungcwaba noma ukugcoba umzimba wakho?" ungase uthole kulula ukusikisela, "Hey, othandekayo, ngingathanda ukudlala umdlalo wekhadi nawe ..." ukukusiza uthole impendulo yalo mbuzo nokunye okuningi.
Sicela wazi ukuthi lokhu akukona 'ukukhohlisa' othile ekubambe inkulumo enzima kodwa ebalulekile ! Ngokusobala, othandekayo wakho uzokubona ngokushesha ukuthi uhlobo luni le ngxoxo uma uqala ukusebenzisa leli khadi, kanti ngenkathi engenqaba ukudlala, ingxoxo yakho izoqhubeka cishe uma uhambise isihloko.
2. Ungathembela kumakhadi
Njengoba nje ungase uthole kunzima ngisho ukuveza indaba yokufa komuntu othandekayo nokuthi yini angase ayifunayo, usebenzisa i-preckinted stack yamakhadi okugcina okufunayo angakusiza ukuba ubuze umbuzo (s) uma unenkinga yokukhumbula noma ukuthola kunzima ukubuza okuthile ngokuzwakalayo. Ngenkathi lekhadi lekhadi linikeza izindlela eziningi zokubamba ingxoxo yokuphela kokuphila ( bheka "Ikhuthaza Ukuvumelana Nezifiso / Ukwenziwa Komuntu" ngezansi ), kulula ukuthembela emibhalweni yekhadi ngalinye kungakhathaliseki ukuthi unquma kanjani ukusebenzisa lezi zikhonkwane.
Njengoba kuphawuliwe ekuqaleni, ukuxoxa ngezifiso zokuphela komuntu othandekayo kungase kube inselele ngezinye izikhathi, yingakho sivame ukugwema le ngxoxo kuqala. Ngakho-ke, uma uzithola ukhula ngokomzwelo ngesikhathi esithile, ungase ukhohlwe ukubuza umbuzo noma uzizwe ungakwazi ukuveza okuthile okushoyo okufunayo noma okudingeka ukwazi. Kulezi zimo, ukuthembela emgodini wekhadi lokudinga ukugcina kanye nemibandela yayo ekhishwe ngaphambilini kungakusiza ugcine ingxoxo yakho yokuphela kokuhamba, futhi / noma ikusize uhlangabezane nanoma yiziphi izikhathi ezinzima.
3. "Angizange Ngicabange Ngalokho"
Kungaphezu kwalokho, uma ubuzwa ukuthi ubhale phansi yonke imibuzo eyodwa ofuna ukuyibuza othandekayo mayelana nezifiso zakhe zokugcina, ungase ufike 10 noma mhlawumbe 20. Inzuzo eyodwa yokusebenzisa ikhadi elikhethekile lokuphela kokuphila umdlalo wukuthi ama-tocks amaningi aqukethe imibuzo eminingi ebalulekile, futhi abaningi babo bathinta izihloko okungenzeka ungacabangi ukuzibuza.
Isibonelo, esinye sezizathu ezivamile abantu abangenayo ingxoxo yokuphela kokuphila ngoba abaningi bethu besaba ukufa nokufa futhi abathandi nje ukucabanga ngokufa kwethu. Nokho, ukwesaba okunjalo kungashukumisa futhi kuthinte izifiso zethu zokugcina, kodwa ngabe ucabanga ukuthi ubuze othandekayo wakho ukuthi abelane ngesimo sakhe sokwesaba ngokufa noma yini eyamshaya ngokufa? Impendulo cishe izofakazela ngokuphawulekayo futhi iqonde ngempela le ngxoxo kodwa ungase ungayazi uma ungaceli.
Ngokufanayo, ukupheka kwekhadi lokuphela kokuphila kungafaka eminye imibuzo engase ingenzeki kuwe, njenge:
- Ingabe ufuna ukufa kwakho kumenyezelwe emithonjeni yezokuxhumana, njenge-Facebook noma i-Twitter?
- Kubaluleke kangakanani ukufa phakathi kwamalungu omndeni / abangani bakho hhayi ngokwakho?
- Uke uthathe izinyathelo zokuvimbela izingxabano zomndeni ngaphambi noma emva kokufa kwakho, njengokuthanda intando yomthetho noma umyalelo wokunakekelwa kwezempilo okuphambili ?
- Ungathanda yini mina noma udokotela wakho ukuba akutshele iqiniso mayelana nokubikezelwa kokunciphisa ukuphila?
- Ucabanga ngamaphi amagama lapho uzwa igama elithi "hospice"?
4. Kususa ukugxila kumuntu oyedwa
Ungabe uzizwa kanjani uma othile emi phambi kwakho ebambe ibhodi lokunamathisela futhi akucele i-group of imibuzo yomuntu siqu ngokujulile? Ungakhululekile? Kubuzwe imibuzo? Ufuna ithuba lokuqala lokugijima? Ngeshwa, lokhu kuvame ukuthi ingxoxo yokuphela kokuphila ingazizwa kanjani kumuntu owenza yonke impendulo njengoba ehlezi endaweni ekhangelwe ngumuntu obuza imibuzo.
Ubuhle namandla wegeyimu yokugcina / yokuphila ekhadini lokugcina umdlalo ukuthi kusiza ukuqeda ukuxoxisana nomuntu oxoxisana naye ngokususa ukugxila kumuntu oyedwa, esikhundleni salokho, ukukhuthaza ingxoxo yangempela phakathi kwabantu ababili noma ngaphezulu. Ngokuvamile, lowo muntu owayefuna ukuqala le ngxoxo ebalulekile nomuntu othandekayo uzothola maduzane ukuthi abuye ahlanganyele imicabango nemizwa yakhe ngokuphendula imibuzo evezwa la makhadi, noma ephendula emphenduleni yomuntu obuseduze, eveza ukuphendula (s ).
Ngaphezu kwalokho, kuyinto engavamile, uma ingxoxo iqala, kwamanye amalungu omndeni nabangane "abafuna ukulalela" futhi bajoyine ingxoxo yokuphela kokuphila njengoba bezwa eminye yemibuzo ebuzwayo noma izimpendulo ezinikeziwe.
5. Kukhuthaza ukuguquguquka / ukwenza ngokwezifiso
Amageyimu amaningi ekhadini lokuphela kokuphila, kuhlanganise nalawo aboniswe esithombeni ngenhla, anikele imiyalelo yokuthi ungasebenzisa kanjani i-deck ukuze uthathe inzuzo enkulu kulolu thuluzi lokugcina lokufisa. Amanye amakhomba akhombisa ukuthi umhlanganyeli ngamunye kufanele aphendule / axoxe ngombuzo ofanayo ngaphambi kokukhetha ikhadi elisha, kanti abanye batusa ukuthi abantu bahlunga wonke amakhadi ngokwezinto abazicabangela zona kakhulu-okungenani kubalulekile ngaphambi kokuqhubeka, noma into ephakathi.
Ukwengeza, amakhadi amancane afana nalawa ngokuvamile anikeza ukuguquguquka okukhulu kokuthi bangaki abantu abangabamba iqhaza esimisweni esinikeziwe. Nakuba ngokuvamile kuhloswe ukwenza lula le ngxoxo ebalulekile ekupheleni kwengxoxo phakathi kwabantu ababili , cishe wonke umdlalo wekhadi / ipaki yamakhadi wokugcina ungabamba abantu abathathu noma ngaphezulu, abangakhuthaza ingxoxo enengqondo phakathi kwengane nabazali bakhe bobabili, isibonelo, noma phakathi komndeni owandisiwe, noma ngisho neqembu elikhulu labantu, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi lihlobene kanjani.
Ngaphezu kwalokho (futhi ngiyabelana ngalokhu ngokuhlangenwe nakho komuntu siqu), uma uthengisa enye yale midlalo yamakhadi / ukuphela kwekhadi lokuphelelwa isikhathi, cishe akunakwenzeka ukuba ungagudluli umkhumbi futhi ucabange ukuthi uzizwa kanjani ngemibuzo ehlukahlukene ebuzwa uma ukhona ngokwakho. Ngamanye amazwi, imidlalo eminingi yamakhadi okuhlela kusengaphambili, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi idizayini noma imvelo yendaba yabo, izokulinga ukuba "udlale" i-solo.
Okungaqinisekisiwe noma cha, ukubhekana nemizwa yakho nemibono mayelana nezinkinga ezibalulekile zokufa kanye nokufa okuphathelene nalezi zindleko lapho kudlala "solitaire" kungakulungiselela kangcono ingxoxo yokugcina yokuphila ofuna ukuyobamba nomunye umuntu.
Okokugcina, yize iningi lamageyimu / amakhadikhadi ekhadi linikeza iziyalezo, ungakhathazeki uma ingxoxo yakho yokuphela kokuphila, lapho iqalisiwe, ihamba futhi ihambela "iskripthi" naphezu kweziqondiso zangempela (futhi lokho kulungile! ) Ukunamathela emiyalweni ethize ehlinzekwa ngezindaba zokugcina umdlalo wekhadi / ipaki yamakhadi okugcina okuncane kakhulu kunokubamba ingxoxo enengqondo nomuntu othandekayo mayelana nemibono yabo, izimo zengqondo nezifiso eziphathelene nezihloko ezinzima zokufa nokufa.
Indlela Yokuthenga I-Deck
Ngenxa yobungcweti bale thuluzi lokuxoxisana kanye nendaba yayo, cishe uzothola umdlalo wekhadi lokugcina / impilo yedokhumenti ku-intanethi esikhundleni sokuthenga esitolo sezitini nesezinto. Amaningi alawa makhadi amathengi athengiswa ngabathengi-aqondiswe yibhizinisi noma inhlangano eyabadala. Ngenkathi ezinye izikhonkwane zikhona, ungathola ulwazi oluthe xaxa mayelana namageyimu wekhadi lokugcina okufunwa ngenhla ku:
• Umdlalo wengxoxo, izingxoxo zokuphila
• Fink: Ukuhlela Okunakekelwa Ngaphambi Kokuqapha, Amakhadi E-Fink
• I-Game Wish Wish, i-Coda Alliance
• I-Heart2Izwa: Ngaphambi kokuhlelwa kokunakekela, Xoxa ngeziqondiso
• Isipho sami Somusa, Ukuzijwayeza Okuvamile
Umlobi ubonga ngobuqotho izinkampani ezingenhla ngokunikeza amakhophi anemininingwane ekhadini labo ngesikhathi sokulungiswa kwalesi sihloko.
Imithombo:
"Ukufela eMelika: Ukuthuthukisa izinga nokuhlonipha izintandokazi ngabanye ngasekupheleni kokuphila" yi-Institute of Medicine, ngo-September 17, 2014. Iqoqo lomlobi.