Iziphakamiso Zokubhekana Nokulahlekelwa Okulindelwe Ngomunye Othandekayo
Ngesikhathi ukufa okungazelelwe, okungalindelekile komuntu othandekayo kungasusa isifufula sosizi nokudabuka, ilunga lomndeni noma umngane oshiya ezinsukwini eziphila ngaphezu kwezinsuku, amasonto, izinyanga noma ngisho nangaphezulu kungabonisa ukukhathazeka kwabasindile ngenxa yesimiso esilindele - ukudabuka wazizwe kusengaphambili kokufa.
Amathiphu Wokubhekana Nokudabuka Okulindelekile
Nazi izinselelo ezimbalwa ezingokomzwelo ongase uzihlangabezane nazo njengoba uzama ukubhekana nokufa okuzayo komthandekayo wakho, nokusikisela okuzokusiza ukubhekana nazo.
Ukuzwa ukhathele
Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi ukhonza njengomnakekeli noma cha, ukwazi ukuthi isikhathi somuntu wakho othandekayo sinomkhawulo kuzothatha umonakalo ngamandla akho angokomzimba nangokomzwelo. Abantu bangaphila ngokuphumelelayo "esimweni esiphuthumayo" okwesikhashana.
Nakuba leso sikhathi sizohlukahluka kuye komuntu nesimo, uma lowo mkhawulo ufinyelelwa, ingqondo nezinzwa zizoqala ukuvalwa njengesilinganiso sokuzivikela. Lokhu kungazibonakalisa ngezindlela eziningi, kubandakanya:
- Isidingo esikhulu sokulala
- Ukungabi nokuhlushwa
- I-"numb numb" ngokomzwelo noma inqola
Kubalulekile ukuqonda ukuthi le mizwa ijwayelekile futhi ayisho ukuthi uyabanda noma awukhathaleli. Ekugcineni, umzimba wakho nengqondo yakho zizophola, futhi uzozizwa ujwayelekile - kuze kube yilapho enye into edala isimo sokuphendula ngokomzwelo. Kufanele ulindele ukuzwa amagagasi anjalo womzwelo nokubuka izikhathi lapho uvale lapho kudingeka futhi unempilo.
Lokho kusho, qiniseka ukuthi uthola nokulala ngokwanele, udle kahle, uchithe isikhathi namanye amalungu omndeni noma abangani, futhi ungakwazi ukubona izimpawu zokukhathazeka komnakekeli .
Ukuzwa Ulimi-Kuboshwe
Ukufa kuyinkinga enzima kubantu abaningi ukuba bakhulume ngazo, ikakhulukazi ngakho lapho kufanele sifakaze ngokufa komuntu othandekayo.
Ngenxa yokuthi sizizwa singakhululekile, sivame ukuqala ukwenza izinkomba ekhanda lethu ngalokho okuthandwa ngumuntu wethu othandekayo noma engafisi ukukhuluma ngokuphathelene nokufa kwabo okuzayo, njengokuthi, "Uma ngichaza ukuthi ngizomkhumbula kangakanani, kuzomenza uzizwe kakhudlwana, "noma" Angiyikusho ukuthi ngiyeke kuze kube sekugcineni ngakho mina nami ngingathola injabulo ngesikhathi esisele. "
Umphumela wenetha wezingxoxo ezinjalo zangaphakathi kaningi akushiwo lutho , okungenza empeleni umuntu oshona azizwe ehlukanisiwe, enganakiwe noma eyedwa.
Njengoba kunzima njengoba kungase kuzwe manje, ukuxhumana okuvulekile nokuqondile kuyindlela engcono kakhulu yokuxhumana nomuntu othandekayo oshonile . Myeke azi ukuthi ungathanda ukukhuluma ngendlela ozizwa ngayo, kanye nokuthi yini ongayinikeza ngesikhathi esisele ngokusekela nokududuzeka.
Uma ingxoxo eqotho iqala, ungase uthole ukuthi ukwesaba kwakho ukuthi le nkulumo isiphelile.
Uzizwa Unecala
Uma umuntu esimthandayo ethola ukuthi unesifo esibulalayo , kulula kakhulu ukugxila konke ukunakekelwa namandla ethu esigulini cishe cishe ngaphandle kwezidingo zethu. Ukucindezelwa okubangelwa ukunakekela othandekayo othandekayo - ikakhulukazi kulabo abahlinzeka ngokubaluleka kokunakekelwa - kungase kuholele ekucindezelekeni komnakekeli njengoba impikiswano engokomzimba, ngokomzwelo nangokwezimali ithatha umonakalo.
Nakuba kungase kubonakale kungenakucabangeki, ukunakekelwa kwengcindezi kungabangela ukufutheka, intukuthelo noma ukukhungatheka ngesiguli esifa - futhi leyo mizwa ivame ukuveza umuzwa ojulile wecala. Uma kushiywe kungalashwa, imizwelo enjalo ingabangela kakhulu usizi oluzwayo ngemuva kokufa kwesiguli, ukubeka engozini yokucindezeleka, imicabango yokuzibulala noma ukucindezeleka kokucindezeleka okulandela emva kwesikhathi.
Uma ubonisa izimpawu zokucindezeleka komnakekeli , kufanele ukhulume ngokushesha nomndeni wakho noma abangane bese uthi, "Ngidinga usizo." Okufanelekile, umuntu angakwazi ukuthatha umthwalo wemfanelo owawugcizelele, ngisho nangesikhashana, ukuze akunikeze ikhefu futhi unciphise ukucindezeleka kwakho.
Uma lokho kungeyona inketho, ke ucabange uhlobo oluhlelekile lokunakekelwa kokuphefumula , njengesikhungo sokunakekelwa kwezinsuku zomdala noma ukuqasha umnakekeli wekhaya, ukuze uzenzele ukuphumula okudingayo.
Nakuba kungase kubonakale kunzima ukuphoqelela ukuba uvumele ukuhamba okwesikhashana, uzobuya futhi uvuselelwe futhi unamandla futhi unikeze ukunakekela okungcono kangcono kumthande wakho othandekayo.
Imithombo:
"Ungasho kanjani Ukuhlelwa Ngesikhathi Umuntu Omthandayo Efela." www.caring.com. U-Paula Spencer Scott, uCaring.com. Ibuyiselwe ngoJulayi 17, 2012. http://www.caring.com/articles/how-to-say-goodbye
"Imithombo Ephathelene Nesikhathi Sokufa." https://hopkinschildrens.org. Isikhungo sezingane sikaJohn Hopkins. Ibuyiselwe ngoJulayi 26, 2012. https://hopkinschildrens.org/Anticipated-Death.aspx <
"I-Long Road." www.jenniferallenbooks.com. UJennifer Allen. Ibuyiselwe ngoJulayi 26, 2012. http://www.jenniferallenbooks.com/grief/pdf/longroad.pdf