Isimo esiphilayo singaba nethonya elikhulu
Uma unesihlungu esingapheli, ingabe lokhu kuthinta ukuthi ngabe ingane yakho nayo ibuhlungu obungapheli yini? Lo mbuzo oyinkimbinkimbi, futhi ucwaningo ukuthi ngabe ukuxhumana okunjalo kukhona yini kuxubile.
Ukuze uhlole ukuxhumeka okunokwenzeka okuqhubekayo, ochwepheshe baqala ukumba ngokujulile ebuhlotsheni bomzali nengane.
Isizathu esisodwa abazitholile njengoba badlala indima engaba khona ekuthonyeni ukuxhumana phakathi kobuhlungu obungapheli bomzali kanye nobuhlungu obungapheli kwengane yabo yisakhiwo somndeni (ngamanye amazwi, isimo sabo sokuphila).
Lokhu kwafunyanwa ngabaphenyi besifundo esikhulu saseNorway eJama Pediatrics .
Ukuchaza ubuhlungu obungapheliyo
Abalobi besifundo kuJama Pediatrics bachaza "ubuhlungu obungapheliyo obuhlungu obungapheliyo" kubantwana abantwabuntwana abathintekayo njengoba ubuhlungu buvela okungenani kanye ngesonto izinyanga ezintathu.
"Ubuhlungu obungapheliyo be-multisite" buchazwa ngokuthi ubuhlungu obungapheli obungapheli okwenzeke okungenani ezindaweni ezintathu ngaphakathi komzimba (isibonelo, isisu, emuva, nekhanda).
Kubantu abadala, ubuhlungu obungapheli buchazwe njengobuhlungu obwenzeka ezinyangeni ezingaphezu kwezinyanga eziyisithupha (lokhu kusho incazelo ejwayelekile).
Umphumela wezinhlungu zomzali ezinganeni zabo ezisencane
Esicwaningweni, intsha engaphezu kuka-7000 kanye nabantu abadala (abaneminyaka engama-13 kuya ku-18) bagcwalisa uhlu lwemibuzo mayelana nobuhlungu. Leli phepha lemibuzo libuzwe ngokuqondile ukuthi ngabe lihlangene nobunzima phakathi nezinyanga ezintathu ezedlule nokuthi kaningi kangakanani (isibonelo, "ngokungajwayelekile," "kanye ngesonto," noma "cishe nsuku zonke").
Khona-ke, abantu abadala abangaphezu kwezinkulungwane ezingamashumi amane baqedela i-questionnaire ephendula le mibuzo:
- "Unayo ubuhlungu emzimbeni manje oselezinyanga ezingaphezu kwezinyanga eziyisithupha?"
- "Ubuhlungu bakho bomzimba bube bunzima kangakanani phakathi kwamasonto amane okugcina?" (izimpendulo kwakungekho ubuhlungu, bubucayi, bubumnene, bulinganise, buqinile, noma bunamandla kakhulu)
Kusukela kuqhutshwa isifundo eNorway, imibuzo yabafundi abasha kanye nabasakhulayo bangase baxhunywe ngemibuzo yomzali wabo ngokusebenzisa izinombolo zomuntu siqu (wonke umuntu eNorway unesinye).
Ngemva kokuxhumanisa abazali nezingane zabo, abaphenyi bashiywa nabantwana abangaphezu kuka-5300 noma abasha abasebancane ababenomzali oyedwa owaye wabamba iqhaza kulolu hlu lwemibuzo.
Lapho kuhlaziywa imibuzo emibili yabazali kanye nezingane zabo ezisencane, kutholakale ukuthi ubuhlungu obungapheliyo noma umama noma ubaba behlotshaniswa nobuhlungu obungapheli obukhulu obungapheliyo kanye nobuhlungu obungapheliyo phakathi kwezizwe ezinganeni zabo. Izingqinamba zalolu buhlungu ezinganeni zazingaphezulu nakakhulu lapho bobabili umama nobaba bebika ubuhlungu.
Lezi zinhlangano zahlala ezifanayo ngisho nabaphenyi bokucwaninga abalawulwa iziguquko ezifana nobulili, ubudala, nesimo sezenhlalakahle.
Kusho ukuthini lokhu?
Lemiphumela engenhla iphakamisa ukuthi ukuxhumana okuqinile kukhona phakathi kokuhlupheka okungapheli komzali nokubuhlungu okungapheli kwezingane zabo ezisencane.
Kungani? Mhlawumbe, umzali onezinhlungu ezingapheliyo uhlinzeka izingane ukuthi zivelele kakhulu ekuziphatheni ubuhlungu, okwenza ukuba zibheke ngokwengeziwe futhi / noma zigxile ezimpawu zomzimba ezibuhlungu. Omunye umqondo wukuthi umzali onesifo esingapheli angenza ingane ingakhathalele kakhulu izimpawu ezihlobene nobuhlungu noma ibe yinto engaphezu kweqile, okungathi ithinte, ngisho nokuqinisa, ubuhlungu bentombazane.
Ngaphezu kwalokho, iqiniso lokuthi izinkinga zokuba nobuhlungu obungapheli ziphakeme uma bobabili abazali bezwa ubuhlungu obungapheli nomzali oyedwa (noma akekho umzali) angabonisa uphawu lokucindezeleka emndenini, kubika abalobi bezocwaningo.
Ngamanye amazwi, kungenzeka ukuthi ngaphandle kokucindezeleka kubangela ukungasebenzi komndeni, okubangela amalungu omndeni amaningi ukuba abike ubuhlungu obungapheli.
Ukwakhiwa Komndeni Kungaba Isiqalo Ekuxhumeleni Abazali Ekuhluphekeni Okungapheli Kwezingane
Ngaphandle kokuhlola ukuxhumana phakathi kobuhlungu bomzali nenzalo, abaphenyi baphinde bahlola ukuguquguquka okungathinta lesi sixhumanisi: isakhiwo somndeni (isimo sokuphila).
Ucwaningo lwathola ukuthi ukusabalala kobuhlungu ezinganeni nasebancane behlisiwe phakathi kwalabo ababehlala nabazali bobabili, ngokumelene nomzali oyedwa.
Ngaphezu kwalokho, intsha kanye nabantu abadala asebehlala ngokuyinhloko nonina, ukuhlupheka kwabo okungapheli kwakungenzeka uma umama wabo enobuhlungu obungapheli.
Izimpikiswano zobuhlungu obungapheli bama-multisite (ubuhlungu obuzwakalayo ezindaweni ezintathu noma ngaphezulu zomzimba) babukhulu nakakhulu uma izingane ezikhulile zihlala ngokuyinhloko nonina nomlingani omusha womama wabo, ngokufana nomama wabo kuphela.
Ngakolunye uhlangothi, uma izingane ezisencane zihlala ngokuyinhloko noyise (noma ubaba nomlingani omusha), izinkinga zabo zokuba nobuhlungu zanda uma noma umama noma ubaba wabo enobuhlungu obungapheli, nakuba ukuxhumana phakathi kokuba nobuhlungu ezindaweni eziningi kule nzalo yayisondelene kakhulu nobuhlungu obungapheli bukababa.
Ngokubanzi, lolu cwaningo luqinisa isimo sezemvelo sokubuhlungu okungapheli, ikakhulukazi ezinganeni. Ngamanye amazwi, akuzona nje izici eziphilayo ezidlala lapho kuziwa ekuhlangenwe nakho kobuhlungu obungapheli, kodwa abasebenza kwengqondo abafana nabantwana abahlala nabo futhi baxhumana nabo nsuku zonke.
Amanye Amaphuzu Okuthakazelisayo Esifundweni
Ucwaningo lubuye lwathola ukuthi izingane eziningi zezingane nabesifazane abaningi babe nobuhlungu obungapheli kunabantwana besilisa noma obaba. Lokhu kusikisela ukuthi kukhona umehluko wobulili phakathi kwentsha nabantu abadala ababika ubuhlungu.
Ngaphezu kwalokho, izingane ezazinenkinga nokucindezeleka zazivame ukuba nobuhlungu obungapheli, njengabazali babo. Lokhu kutholakala okuvamile, futhi kuvame ukungaqondakali ukuthi yini efika kuqala, ubuhlungu noma ukukhathazeka / ukucindezeleka-inkukhu ngokumelene neqanda conundrum. Ngokuvamile ubuhlungu kanye nezimpawu zengqondo zondla omunye nomunye zidala umjikelezo ononya.
Okokugcina, ukubika okubuhlungu okungapheli kunciphise kokubili omama kanye nobaba, njengoba izinga lemfundo kanye neholo landa. Njengokwakheka komndeni, lokhu kusekela indima yezinto ezithinta imvelo ekunciphiseni ubuhlungu obungapheliyo.
Izwi elivela
Lolu cwaningo alusekeli nje kuphela uhlobo olunezinhlobonhlobo zokubuhlungu okungapheli kwabasakhulayo nabasakhulayo abancane kodwa futhi lisikisela ukuthi uma ukwelapha ubuhlungu obungapheli ezinganeni, imvelo yomndeni idinga ukucatshangelwa.
Uma unomntwana ozwa ubuhlungu obungapheli, ukuthatha indawo ekhaya njengomzali ukucabangela ukuthi umndeni wakho ungasetshenziswa kanjani njengethuluzi elihle ekusizeni ingane yakho ukuba ibhekane kangcono nobuhlungu bayo. Yiqiniso, ungathwali lo mthwalo wedwa-ukhulume nethimba lezempilo lezingane kanye nobuhlungu bezingane zakho.
> Imithombo:
> American Pain Society. (Januwari 2012). Ukuhlola nokuphathwa kwezingane ezinezinhlungu ezingapheliyo .
> I-Hoftun GB, i-Romundstad PR, i-Rygg M. Association yobuhlungu obungapheli bomzali obunesihlungu esingapheli kumuntu osemusha kanye nomuntu osemusha osemusha: idatha yomxhumanisi womndeni kusuka ocwaningweni lwe-HUNT. I-JAMA Pediatr . 2013 Jan; 167 (1): 61-9.
> Palermo TM, Holley AL. Ukubaluleka kwemvelo yomndeni ekuhluphekeni okungapheli kwezingane. I-JAMA Pediatr. 2013 Jan; 167 (1): 93-94.