Ukudabuka Kungokwemvelo, Kodwa Akusiyo Phakade
Abazali abaningi bazizwa bedabuke kakhulu lapho ingane yabo ithola ukuthi i-autism. Ngokuvamile, leyo nsizi ihlobene nomqondo wokulahleka. Ngenkathi ingane yabo isengxenye yezimpilo zabo, abanye abazali bazizwa ukuthi balahlekelwe ingane abayilindele, noma ingane abacabanga ukuthi banayo. Abanye bakhathazekile ngokuqaphela ukuthi ingane yabo nge-autism cishe iyophila impilo yabo yonke ngokukhubazeka.
Kanti abanye bayadabuka ngenxa yokucabanga ukuthi ngeke bakwazi ukunikeza oshade nabo noma abazali isipho somntwana "ophelele" noma umzukulu.
Nakuba usizi luyisenzo sokwemvelo kubazali abaningi, izazi zokusebenza kwengqondo uCindy Ariel noRobert Naseef zinikela ngamasu okuphatha nokuhlukumeza ubuhlungu.
Kusukela kuDkt. Cindy Ariel: Amaphupho Amasha Iphupho futhi Gubha Injabulo Entsha
Kukhona ukulahlekelwa okuningi ngokuphila, futhi kubonakala ngombono omkhulu, ukulahleka ngalunye kuhlanganisa incazelo nokujula emiphakathini yethu. Sonke sizwa usizi ezindaweni eziningi ezimpilweni zethu kodwa lokho akunciphisi izikhathi zethu zenjabulo nenjabulo. Eqinisweni, usizi lubonisa injabulo ngoba injabulo inomnandi kakhulu ngemva kokudabuka.
Njengoba siza ukwamukela lapho izingane zethu zikhona khona nokuthi ziyiziphi ngempela, siphupha amaphupho amasha kubo kanye nasemindenini yethu futhi la maphupho amasha cishe angase asekelwe ekuqinisweni ngakho-ke kungenzeka ukuthi angakwazi ukufinyelela.
Lapho sake siphupha mayelana nokuxoxa nezingxoxo zefilosofi nengane yethu, manje singase nje sifune ukuzwa ukuthi basitshele umama noma ubaba noma bathi ngiyakuthanda ... kanye kanye. Amaphupho ethu kumele ashiye ukuzwa lapho ingane yethu ikhuluma ngokugcwele futhi igxile kunokuba nje ibheke emehlweni ethu futhi simomotheka. Uma imigomo emisha enjalo ifinyelelwa, kuyathokoza ngempela.
Lokhu akusho ukuthi ngezinye izikhathi asifisi noma sifune ingane esiyicabangile. Uma sigxila lapho, singase sibe nomuzwa wokudabuka ngaso sonke isikhathi.
Ukuphupha amaphupho amasha nokujabula ngemigomo emisha kusisiza sizizwe sijabule nengane esinayo ngempela. Akekho ofuna noma yikuphi ukuhlupheka okumele kwenzeke izingane zabo. Singase sizizwe sidumala, sinecala, futhi sibuhlungu lapho ingane yethu inenkinga ezokwenza impilo, esevele ilukhuni, ngisho nangaphezulu. Sibhekana nobunzima futhi sithanda izingane zethu ngisho nalapho sibuhlungu futhi sigubha ukuphila kwabo okuyingqayizivele nesikhathi esinikezwa ukuba sibe ndawonye.
Kusuka kuDkt. Robert Naseef: Zinike Isikhathi Sokudabuka, Ukuphulukisa, Nokuwamukela
Ukudabuka kungase kufike kumagagasi futhi kungase kuthathe izindawo ongazange uzilindele ukuya kuzo. Kuyinto inqubo evamile futhi yemvelo, ezayo futhi iya. Okokuqala qaphela ukuthi awuwedwa kulokhu futhi ukuthi imizwa yakho eyenza i-gamut ngokwesaba, icala, intukuthelo, nokucindezeleka empeleni yizimpawu zenhliziyo ephukile. Ngakho qhubeka uphinde ubheke usizi lwakho.
Qaphela imicabango yakho nemizwa yakho. Bamukele futhi ube nomusa ngokwakho ngokuba nazo. Akusizi ukuzenza sengathi ulungile uma ungaphansi, ungesabi, noma udabukile. Akudingeki uqambe amanga kuwe.
Ungakwazi ukudabuka. Ungakwazi ukukhononda. Ungalila. Lokhu kukusiza ukuba uqhubeke, wenze konke okusemandleni, futhi ujabulele ukuphila.
Kuyinto engokwemvelo ukuzibuza ukuthi kungenzeka yini. Ukulangazelela ingane enempilo yamaphupho akho noma impilo ejwayelekile kuwe nomndeni wakho kungase kukhuthaze. Kufanele ufunde ukuhlala nalokho okulangazelayo, futhi ungakwenza lokho, kodwa akudingeki uqambe amanga ngokwakho ukuthi lokhu kungaba nzima kanjani.
Okwesibili, zama ukuzitholela ngokwakho-njengomuntu onothando nomusa owenza konke okusemandleni akho nengane yakho ngokungangabazeki enza konke okusemandleni akhe ngaphansi kwezimo ezivivinyayo.
Okokugcina, ukwamukela ubuhlungu bethu kanye nathi ngokwethu kubangela ukwamukela nokujabulela ingane yethu nomndeni wethu.
Lena yindlela yokuthanda nokujabula. Ukuxhunywa okujulile okushiwo umzali ngezingane ezisanda kuzalwa, noma izinyathelo zokuqala zomntwana, noma amagama okuqala angazizwa nganoma yisiphi isikhathi lapho siyazi futhi sihambisana nomntwana wethu. Lokho uxhumano olujulile luphila ngaphakathi kwakho. Njengoba uvuselela, ungathola injabulo ejulile kakhulu. Akusho ukuthi impilo yakho iyoba lula. Kodwa ingajabula futhi iphumelele.
URobert Naseef, Ph.D., noCindy Ariel, i-Ph.D., bangabalingisi be-"Amazwi avela ku-Spectrum: Abazali, Ugogo nomkhulu, Abantakwethu, Abantu abane-Autism, nabasebenzi Ababelana Ngokuhlakanipha Kwabo" (2006). Ewebhu kwizinye izinketho.